Middle of the Month

I was asking my husband recently whether he thought it looked like I had lost weight.  He told me that it is not about the weight.  It is about health and my long term avoidance of diabetes (runs in both sides of my family), etc.

I know, I know…but.  Losing weight and feeling my clothes fit better and looser is such an exciting and rewarding feedback.  The health stuff is so nebulous.  Frankly, although I was/am a little (approx 50 lbs) overweight my conventional(as in cholestrol, blood sugar) health numbers were absolutely stellar (even better than my superfit and younger husband’s cholestrol check up).  So I cannot really look for improvement there to get some rewarding feedback for the denial of sugar that I am trying to continue.

In a previous post I wrote about some of the benefits of going sugar free for me (maybe I need to go back and read it?)…weight loss was just one of many.  But it is concrete and measurable and so easy to track unlike my mood or even sleep….(both of the latter two have not been that great of late)

So I am going to try to focus on the NSV’s (non scale victories) for encouragement that I am going in the right direction.  Changes I would like to see:

  • better mood
  • more energy
  • better sleep
  • do a full pushup
  • when I wake up not to feel groggy but energized for the day
  • feeling/getting stronger

Recently my mood has been so bad and I feel so bloated and big.  Not really sure why that is.  I did do a quick peek on the scale (oops!) and thankfully at least I’m maintaining at 162.5 so not sure why I feel so big and don’t feel like my clothes are looser like I did when I started losing weight (within 2 weeks I seriously felt and saw a difference in my weight).

Hmmm…I kinda feel bad literally navel gazing on the internet about my weight when other people have actual, serious problems in life.  My hope is that I can sort out my health/weight/food obsession and live my true purpose to help people.  Is that naive?


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