Regarding the only bible reading plan: mega-utter-fail.
I needed to write the above out. I wasn’t really even trying too much after the first breach….which took all of a week (at the most) to happen. There were a thousand reasons why I wanted to saturate my mind with Bible reading and stay away from other sorts of wisdom.
I could go into detail about why it failed but the bottom line was that I was pushing my round and squiggly self into a square peg hole …literally beating it…and somehow I think that is such a disservice/insult to God. I mean He wants people to love Him and desire Him because He is so completely worthy.
After speaking with a friend, I thought perhaps I am going about this the wrong way. Perhaps I need to rediscover my joy and delight in Him and work on finding this. She suggested that for a creative person like me (not sure I ever thought of myself like that but I have always maintained that I am SQUIGGLY…haha) maybe reading the Bible at the same time everyday for half an hour was not going to feed my soul as I imagined…that I needed to be creative about this endeavor..find excitement in His word in a more authentic to me way. Again I don’t know how to do this….sometimes I feel like I am going in a big circle but …maybe not.
Right now I am simply praying for direction and help and…enjoying Him and the big and little gifts he gives me. Sharing my frustrations with him, thanking him as I jog lightly in the cool almost-autumn night. Constantly saying thank you when I kiss my sweet baby’s soft skin. Turning to Him when chocolate covered almonds called their siren song in the groccery store. That sort of thing.
I just can’t give up is all I know for sure. He never has on me.