“I learned something very important last year; you can’t really say yes, if you can’t really say no.
Think of it this way, a mom sends her child with candy telling him he has to share.
If someone asks him for it, the only answer he’s allowed to give is ys.
So is his yes, really a yes?
I humbly submit to you, no.
If you can’t really say no, then you can’t really say yes.
I lie to myself and lie to others that I am making so many choices.  No one wants to admit that they’re often programmed
like a computer, that choice is a mirage in the distance, just out of grasp…leaving you thirsty often.
Smokers say they can quit anytime, yet they keep on paying the man their retirement money and using their lungs as an
industrial smokestack, just for the privilege of killing themselves softly.
Choice lacking logic, seeped in the quicksand of emotion…are not really choices.
My fear of being alone or not liked, leaves me to a whirlwind life 
filled with creeping resentment
I hate that I cannot say no more often because of this fear,
of what others think, of how perceive me
It has taken me years to get that true friends accept your no
I’ve had quite a few rounds with Mr. Chocolate.  Logic and I rarely win.  Sugar damaging my system is nothing, when
something says quick gobble it up before it runs away – the way chocolate bars often do.
Why do pathways to addiction look like roadways of freedom?  Here have a drink, shoot up,
sleep with him or her or it…you’re free, you’re an adult, you can do what you please…
Wrong…the enemy smiles and winks as you we willingly walk into his gilded traps, giggles
while we lock our own prisons and throw away its keys. 
  What a bargain he shouts!
And we buy in and realizing too late that we’ve purchased momentary pleasures sought at the expense of lifetime sorrows.
What happens when your soul acts up and shouts out, when your skin crawls and you keep returning to yesterday’s vomit,
the thing which is destroying you?
When your mind is obsessed with food or money or sex, do you think you are making choices?
Do you think you are free?
Unless you really, truly, and HONESTLY can say no to something, then are you not its slave?
It crooks its finger, and almost inevitably like a dog on a leash, you are pulled along, pushed along until your
right back THERE again.  The place you have begun to hate, the place you don’t want to be….what was once sought for pleasure
is now sought to simply numb the mind and relieve the pain.
FREEDOM, in direct opposition to the popular position, is not found in indulging in everything and anything at anytime with anyone.  What gives wings to my feet an puts a song on my heart is the ability to say NO; the felling of NOT being enslaved and distracted by desires or wants, by each movement of the wind, or by the pressing of the crowd.  To leave myself open, opeN, oPEN, to the higher orderings and callings of my mind being transformed by my God.”



One response to “POEM #2

  1. This is one amazingly true comment. I could not agree with you more. Very well written!!!

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