Open letter to myself

People tell me I give pretty good advice.  Today, I’m going to try something really bold…I’m going give myself a piece of my mind….here goes…

Dear Sanji:

Ditch him! 

Why?…let me count the ways:

Just because after one phone conversation with him you desired him and with one look into his eyes you knew you were going to marry him (no shadow of doubt), does not mean you were not flat out WRONG.

Just because he is the only man in .32 yrs to make you instantly go weak in the knees, does not mean there won’t be others (or at least another 🙂  Anyway, such feelings can and have developed with others.

Just because you hate shopping and house decorating (unusual for a woman) and he loves those things (unusual for a man), does not mean you are made for each other.  (yes, yes, the gay angle has been beaten to death)

Just because he played that match box song that you have always loved during one of your first phone conversations does not mean that you were meant for each other.

Just because you said goodbye and kept away, white knuckling it for over 2 years at one point, does not mean you cannot say goodbye again.

Just because he is not right for you does not make either of you bad people.  Your gut instinct that he is a good person does not have to be wrong for him to be wrong romantically for you.

Just because he was very kind during a super difficult time in your life when your father was first diagnosed  cancer, does not mean that you owe him something.  Love is free…God will take care of him and repay him for his kindness even if you won’t or can’t.

You must remember that he is a self-proclaimed big flirt…he is very good at getting women to fall for him.

You must remember that he is a very damaged soul who has been repeating this same pattern with women over and over again.  He is afraid of committment but seeks to gain all the emotional benefits of having a girlfriend without such committment. 

You must rember that HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.  When a man wants you, there won’t be any doubt.

You must remember that a true friend is kind and will not hurt you by  ignoring numerous attempts to initiate.

You forget that he has told you in writing and verbally more than once that he loves you dearly as a friend and nothing more.

You forget that you want to be loved and wanted completely and passionately.

you forget that you deserve for your hurt to be cared about…you forget that someone will be tender to you and will care for you so much that he will never leave you in the dark or confuse you the way that this guy has.

You forget how one of your wisest most spiritual friends told you that you should never keep anything in your life which hurts your relationship with God

You forget that you are working to make honesty a key part of your personality.  You are learning to honour truth in yourself and you want that in every relationship you have.  He is so emotionally immature that he is yet to be very honest with himself, much less those around him.

You forget that you don’t want to be one of those girls that your brother joked around about it…that keeps on talking about the same guy 3 years later….:)

You forget that all your best friends, every person who really loves you….including your dad, thinks he’s a jerk for breaking your heart so many times.

You forget that that you have met better men then him….many men, many times over.  Why would you want to be with a lesser man?

You forget that you are beautiful, brilliant, kind, sweet, funny, fun, faithful, loyal, talented, real…and quite simply wonderful…and  that you deserve better. You deserve a man that understands how amazing you are, who wakes up every morning thinking to himself that he is so lucky to have captured your much-sought-after heart.

You forget that people literally clamor for you time and attention.

You forget that God is your very great treasure…(Genesis) and that he is your hiding place (psalm).  He is your rock….and that you want nothing and no one to disturb your peace

Kick him to the curb, honey.

I love you. 

‘the Sanj’


One response to “Open letter to myself

  1. Oh Sanj! This is beautifully written. I don’t need to tell you this because you have very obviously figured it out, but you’re too good for him.

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